Change Now, Reap Later

“New year, new me,” but you’re still doing the same things from 2018. “I’m starting the business this year,” but you’re still hanging around your demotivated friends. “Oh, I am definitely going to start this diet,” but you’re still hitting McDonalds for that 2 for $5 Fish Filet. “I’m over them and won’t give them another chance,” but you’re still sending them “wyd” texts when you get lonely. “I won’t cheat on you again,” but you’re still responding to those late night “you up?” texts and still answering DMs on social media. “I’m going to value myself and my body,” but you’re still posting thirst traps.” “I’m going to change Lord,” but you’re still living the same life as non-believers. “God, I’m going to follow your plan and go where you lead me,” but you’re still trying to make your own dreams happen.

I’m sure many of you saw yourselves somewhere in those situations. If not, wow – maybe you really did change and don’t need to read this. But the predicaments we find ourselves in aren’t just limited to those above. Like me, I’m sure reading one, or some, of those scenarios hit home pretty hard like, “dang, how does he know my life?” These are real scenarios that countless people face but don’t address. Maybe they feel stuck in their ways, or think it’s impossible to change, or have become numb to it altogether. Regardless of the reason, you are dealing with a serious issue that requires real dedication to turn things around. You can only change if you want to; no one else can make you do it.

If you’re choosing to act and start this journey, you’ve made the right choice to a better future and a better you. If you felt any kind of way reading the situations above, then you must know, deep down, there are some things in your life that need to change. Putting it off only prolongs the suffering that may not be as apparent now but will become clear in time. Tomorrow isn’t promised; so you don’t know how much time you’re working with. Time waits for no one and once it’s gone, it’s gone.

So here are my steps (in no particular order) to spark a change, and making it a permanent one this time:

Be Intentional

Listen. If you are talking about losing weight, yet still find yourself eating late night snacks, frequently eating out at fast food spots, and/or are not being consistent with a workout plan, you should not be surprised when the scale says, “Ahah hah” when you step on it. Being intentional means you are taking real action and staying consistent after the fact. You should constantly be trying to find ways to keep the momentum going and shouldn’t allow small setbacks to derail you.

You know the goal you are trying to achieve, you understand that it will take a great deal of effort to reach it, but you must be committed to the cause to make it a reality. Without that fire under you, you will find yourself slowly falling back into your old ways, giving excuses for not making progress, and trying to justify why you should give up. Don’t repeat that cycle for umpteenth time.

Make a List of the Internal & External Detrimental Factors

We are a generation of working on outer appearance and as a result, forget to address our inner appearance as well. Take a good look within yourself at who you are as a person. If you truly understand yourself, you will know the kinds of habits, actions, characteristics, etc. you have that are working against you. Be thorough with your thought process because sometimes, the factors that you give the least credit to have the biggest impact. You have to be 100% honest with yourself in order to figure it out, and 100% willing to step out of your own way to deal with it.

External factors are just as impactful as the internal ones because these are things you interact with often. If you wave them off as less serious or keep telling yourself that they don’t affect you as much, you are making yourself more vulnerable. The things that affect us the most are the things we don’t prepare for and/or see coming – trust me, the enemy is working 24/7. When you are cognizant of the kind of influences that surround you, you are then able to address and manage them in an effective manner. But again, you have to take a good look at the people (refer to my blog post on your circles), environments, and situations around you to really discern and understand what could be a hindrance.

Solidify Steps That Signify Progress

If you create benchmarks to show that you are actually moving in the right direction, it will help you track real progress. Now, progress may be difficult to define depending on your case; so it’s important to take time to think this over so you don’t mistake a lucky break, or a one-time thing, as being on the right track. For example, if you are trying to improve your grade in a course, going to class more consistently may seem like progress, but if you aren’t staying the whole time and/or aren’t engaging in the discussions, it’s not. Finding someone who has made great strides dealing your problem area, and having them review your steps to provide feedback, can be a huge help as well.

Remember Your Why

Your why is the motivating factor behind you making a change and becoming a better you. Not only will it play into your story that will become a testimony one day, it will become someone else’s push to shape up when their time comes (because God isn’t having you go through the fire to only help yourself). So be open to sharing your life story, and don’t be afraid to show the broken pieces of your life because the cracks are where the light shines through (yeah, I was SNAPPING when I wrote that).

Select an Accountability Partner

We both know if you could’ve done this on your own, you wouldn’t need to read this post. Having a person be your accountability partner ensures that you have someone else there to encourage you and prevent you from regressing to your old ways. If you don’t know by now, I am Christian, and I move with the mindset that God watches everything I do. But unfortunately, at times, it isn’t enough to prevent taking steps back (being open and honest here – I know I’m not the only one).

Once you pick someone, you can do check-ins, and just be blunt about how your journey is going – the good, the bad, the really bad, etc. They may even help point out additional things you can do to continue heading in the right direction. But this must be someone you will fully disclose everything to or it will defeat the whole purpose. If you can’t be fully transparent with them, they can’t serve in this role for you- period (note the omission of the t).

Think of the Future You

Society pushes the lifestyle and mindset of living in the now. Although this can be a good thing when it comes to taking in what life has to offer, it can also make us very short-sighted when it comes to challenges that take time. One reason many of us are unable to change and stay that way is because we want to see immediate results that outweigh the “benefits” we had beforehand. But just like it took time to get rooted in that problem, and for you to finally start making the right changes, it will take time to fully embrace this shift in your life and see the positive outcomes.

This isn’t something that can be rushed. But if you continue to be a forward thinker with the mindset of who you can be in the future if you make the right decisions now, that should give you enough motivation to keep going. Think about it- if you had made this change a year ago, imagine what you could be doing now and where you could be. The possibilities are endless.

I know- change is scary. It’s something out of our comfort zone and that means being uncomfortable. It means we have to actually try. It means we may end up in a different space that we aren’t used to inhabiting. But who said change was supposed to come easy? Who said the process to attaining the most worthwhile things in life was simple? I won’t sugarcoat it – change is gonna take work! But it’s necessary, and the only way to make it happen is to grind it out.

Change is obviously easier said than done, and I honestly can’t tell you what the outcome will be, but I can guarantee it will put you in a better place than you are now. Step out of your own way and stop letting these impediments hinder you from seeing the big picture. Why? Because you can preorder the future you want if you’re willing to reorder your thinking and actions right now (SNAPPED A-GAIN).